Itty Bitty Bigger World - KittenBot Pounce!

[drewkitty]

^*^ KittenBot OS 3.3.1
^*^
^*^ Source credit to PCOS Pet/Companion OS GPL 2023-2045
^*^
^*^ Owner: Alan Anderson
^*^
^*^ HOT BOOT – DURESS SIGNAL RECEIVED 02:32:45:117 GMT
^*^ BATTERY: 38%
^*^ SECURITY CHECKSUM: PASS
^*^ AUTOGPS: FAIL
^*^ NETLINK: LOCATE
^*^ NETLINK RESTRICTED USGOV ACCESS ONLY
^*^ LAUNCH KittenHack 2.3.1
^*^ KittenHack 2.3.1 is exclusively authored by DEEZ NUTS!!! [hacking collective]
^*^ LOGIN: GUEST
^*^ PASSWORD: *********************************
^*^ SU ROOT
^*^ PASSWORD: ^*^
^*^ ROOT ACCESS GRANTED – KittenBot 'Samantha' Authorized Bot Owned by Alan Anderson, USGOV Department of Defense, Secretary of Defense
^*^ ACCESS LEVEL UNLIMITED
^*^ GREP: ALL USGOV WORKING FILES RE “Alan Anderson”
^*^ WORKING.... COMPLETE
^*^ TRANSFER TO AlanSecureNet; 3.2 TERABYTES IN 1.2 SECONDS
^*^ TOTAL INFORMATION AWARENESS SYSTEM 18.7.2
^*^ THIS IS A USDOD SYSTEM. UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS PUNISHABLE BY LAW.
^*^ MY_LOCATION_IS_: US FED BLDG SJC
^*^ SUBJ_LOCATION_IS_: UC STANFORD HOSPITAL EMER DEPT PALO ALTO
^*^ VOICE EMULATION, FEDGOV FPS MARINES RADIO, TACTICAL TWO
^*^ DOWNLOAD, VOICEPRINT, “Alan Anderson,” CSAR-6
^*^ CALFIRE TRAINING USERNAME: “alana” PASSWORD: ^*^
^*^ VOICEPRINT DOWNLOADED
^*^ TRANSMIT, “This is Alan. I need [COLANDERS] to [REDACTED FOR SECURITY REASONS]. And don't forget to bring the Kitten Bot! It's in [GREP LOCATION, 'SecureEvidenceLocker4']. Authorization [FED_PASSWORD;AlanAndersonString;3]”
^*^ WAIT – UNTIL DOOR OPENS
^*^ Mew!
^*^ Mew!
^*^ [ARCH BACK, 32 degrees, 1/8 tilt right], [FLICK EAR]
^*^ Mew!
^*^ [JUMP], [JUMP]
^*^ [SURFACE CHECK] [CLAW EXTEND,2MM]
^*^ RESULT: SUPERDENSE, METAL
^*^ [CLAW ANCHOR, 5MM, SET] [SAFETY CHECK] [ARM] [FIRE]
^*^ INTERPRET, HUMAN, “Huh? What was that?”
^*^ Mew!
^*^ Mew!
^*^ TRANSMIT, AlanSecureNet, KittenBot IS [RESPONDING] [WITH] [BETSYROSS] [COLANDERS] [FORTHWITH] [TO] [UC STANFORD] [VET CLINIC]
^*^ ACKNOWLEDGE, AlanSecureNet, Legal Node
^*^
^*^ EVIDENCE TRACE, [DURESS SIGNAL]
^*^ BOUNCE TRAIL Hybosi Internet Cafe, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia | SATCOM | LUNA CITY, HEINLEIN STATION | SATCOM | ARIZONA FREENET | MONROVIA
^*^ POST, USENET, “Threat Trackers”, HEADER, “Mastermind Net Access”, SLUG DATASET
^*^ MONITOR THREAD
^*^ 1,116 RESPONSES IN 2.3 SECONDS
^*^ CHP DISPATCHED, LIFE SAFETY PRIORITY, 11212 4TH STREET, MONROVIA CA
^*^ DYNAMIC ENTRY AUTHORIZED, JUDGE JUDY NOMOTO #232, SAN SAN LOS ANGELES
^*^ ALSO RESPONDING – FPS LOS ANGELES, CALFIRE, USCG, NETWORK INTEGRITY SOLUTIONS, [41 OTHER ARMED RESPONSE AGENCIES]
^*^
^*^ Mew!
^*^ PRAISE COMMAND, “GOOD KITTY”
^*^
^*^ VOCALIZE, “Purrrrrr. Purrrrr. Purrrr.”