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Disclaimer: Down The Rabbit Hole posts are fictional.

In 2009 we elected President Obama. He brought a very old idea forward, making it brand new for the 21st century.



Welfare as we knew it was abolished. In its place came a government jobs program called the WPA, or Works Progress Administration.

The goal: total employment of every American who gets income from the government. Anyone who wanted any government aid or assistance at all including previously sacrosanct middle-class perks like student loans, had to agree to the following conditions:

-- 30 hours per week of work
-- menial labor suited to the person's demonstrated skills and capabilities
-- often backbreakingly hard manual labor for the first six months, or other distasteful work, to establish transfer eligibility to more lucrative opportunities

In exchange, the WPA employee would get:

-- 30 hours per week of pay at minimum wage (adjusted for disability, etc., usually up)
-- access to Federal minimum health care coverage for themselves and one other person
-- opportunities at programs which would also cover room and board but required travel, often to relatively remote areas of the country

Another element was the "bureaucracy waiver." An otherwise qualified employee who could pass practical tests demonstrating their skill in a field otherwise requiring professional licensing or certification could work under the supervision of a licensee and would be assigned to a WPA position in which they would use their professional skills while attending a certification program (NOT of their choice, I might add) heavily subsidized by the government.

This waiver is why I am now working as a Field Correctional Education Specialist (WPA-Skilled-5). I am making a little less money than I was, but my job is basically to travel from prison to prison, teaching prisoners due for release within six months basic job skills and life skills to keep them out of the slammer -- not incidentally by getting the skids greased for them to make it in the WPA. Working with prisoners is how I got around the manual labor requirement -- and after a year of it, I'll be eligible to go back to academia as a Research Specialist. A nominal stipend to research whatever the heck I want, as long as I publish. In ten years, student loan forgiveness. If I stop publishing, back to prison teaching for me -- or if I don't hack that job, possibly all the way down to EMT-Basic (WPA-Skilled-2) in a WPA health care clinic, or failing that, WPA-Unskilled-1 (pushing an idiot stick, whether it be broom or shovel or hoe.) There's a social stigma to being WPA-Unskilled-1; and a lot of addicted Second Life and WarCraft players endure 30 hpw of stick work to enjoy 60+ hpw of alternate reality on laptops using camp wi-fi.

I would love to be paid to research stuff. In the meantime, correctional teaching is intensely satisfying work because I am working with people who did bad things and made bad choices who actually WANT to stay clean and actually now see a way to do it.

Of course, another last century invention is also providing considerable motivation for the prisoners. The chain gang is back, folks, and violent or repeat offenders risk ankle shackles for six to fourteen months, breaking rock and doing other intense labor that even WPA workers won't do. This includes violent offenses inside prison! Shank someone and end up making little ones out of big ones, fourteen months on and six off, until your sentence expires. Whatever you do, don't injure your feet -- or you'll get to find out how to make rope by hand, all day every day until your feet heal.

The President meant it. Everybody works.

Everybody. Several categories of job are now formally recognized. Homemaker and child care specialist (for your own family, minimum two kids but you can adopt one to qualify) are now unpaid WPA positions with the health care coverage. The trade off is being trained in basic housekeeping, cooking, and parenting skills -- or testing out. Many volunteer jobs have been WPA'd at various levels. The funding stream may vary but the conditions are the same. Basically, enough for someone to survive on while doing what they love -- or chasing a path to it.

On disability? WPA has a slot for you. 100% disabled, can't move a muscle? Read books to audio for the blind? Blind, you say? WPA has work for you too, don't worry. Disabled means that you are accommodated under the Americans with Disabilities Act, sometimes at great expense -- but you still "work your thirty" unless you want to stop getting your check each month.

This has completely revitalized the inner cities of America, I might add. Cleaning and restoration projects, infrastructure investments, you name it. Anyone who wanted "out of the ghetto" has many WPA work camp projects to choose from. But as many people want into the inner city as went out of it.

A national shame has also been addressed. Old age homes. WPA laborers are provided under contract to nursing home facilities and other elder care options, some of them quite creative. Saves Medicare a ton of money. We may still be warehousing our elderly, but we're not letting them suffer and die because they are economically inconvenient.

The only exception to WPA is disabled veterans and the retired over 70. But even some of them choose to do WPA work, if not volunteer. Veterans do get better health care and first dibs on some of the WPA jobs.

Nobody "has" to do WPA -- unless you get a monthly check that says "US Treasury" on it. There are plenty of people in private sector employment . . . and business is booming! A lot of these WPA projects have secondary economic impacts that ripple through the economy. It's not uncommon for someone on WPA to be applying for work elsewhere -- and when they get it, a version of Cobra gives them WPA health coverage until their work coverage kicks in. Even if it never does.

Where did the money come from? It's not really all that much. 10% unemployment on 120 million people is 12 million. 30 hpw times $7 per hour (national average-ish) is $210 per week, or $880 per month. Call it $1000 after some of the fringe benefits. That's right, the actual outlay for the program wages is only $12 billion a month, or less than $150 billion a year. Only half the DOD budget. Are there more people on WPA? Yes, but we were already paying for it and getting nothing back.

What are we getting for it? Investment in America as a nation. Roads, bridges, highways. A health care system. Better prisons more closely tied to the community. Campgrounds, parks, trails. Three generations of deferred maintenance caught up on. Revitalized schools and universities and training academies. A flowering of long term investment in the common good.

How do we get the health care system? An enormous mass of WPA semi-skilled laborers trained by rote in basic care skills: receptionist, entry clerk, patient care advocate ("sit there and watch the patient"), EMT and medical assistant. Career paths to LVN and higher levels of technician. Nursing school. If you want to be a doctor, WPA is going to be turning out thousands of them in the next two years -- and all of them are training on the job. The best health care? No, not really. But a heck of a lot better than nothing!

The details are still being fine-tuned, but it is amazing to live and work in an America where everyone works. It's no longer cool to not work when work is so available to everyone, in virtually any guise that someone can imagine. Historical Research Assistant - Writing and Culture (Science Fiction)-Skilled-3. Curriculum Development Specialist (K-12) Cultural Literacy-Skilled-5. Apprentice Carpenter-Skilled-2. If you can imagine it, there's a WPA job for it -- and if there isn't, you can propose your own and get it approved. You may have to keep trying . . . I know one guy who has been trying to get Mage-Skilled-6 approved. His latest draft reads "Applied Thaumaturgy - Apprentice (Reality Enhancement)-2" with a career path to Skilled-6; and in the meantime, he's a Library Assistant (Shelving)-Unskilled-3.

A lot of homeless people have been thrilled to get on WPA. Some have not -- mental health and drug issues. But we have a LOT more mental health and drug programs than we ever have had before . . .

In the meantime I do my work knowing that I'm making a difference. And so is every other American who possibly can.

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