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FICTION: Judgment Call
Feb. 29th, 2012 09:26 pmFICTION
Judgment Call
Copyright 2014 by Drew Kitty, All Rights Reserved
prepublication copy, not for public distribution
(pride) I am proud of what I do. I see others running around. Most are in cars or yards. More often I smell them. On wood trees and metal trees. But I am too busy to sniff the news. I work for a living. I keep her safe. I look out for cars. I stop at curbs and stairs. I look for low things she might fall into and high things she might run into. I work. I work hard. Sometimes I am bored listening to people saying people things. But I am very proud.
I used to be proud.
- - -
"In your opinion, are neodogs as _stable_ as regular trained dogs?"
"Objection, leading the witness!"
"Rephrase the question, counselor."
"In your opinion, how stable are neodogs?"
"They are more sure-footed than natural dogs."
"Will the witness please answer the question?"
"Will the attorney please ask the question he wants answered?"
The Judge interrupts. "Mrs. Dekolb, please. Do not answer a question with a question. Counsel will rephrase the question again."
"Mrs. Dekolb, as a trainer of both neodogs and 'natural' dogs, which is more psychologically stable?"
"Neodogs are the product of genetic engineering. They are smarter than _natural_ dogs and require more attention, more training. A well trained neodog is much more stable than a natural dog."
"What if the neodog is less well trained?"
"He might become a lawyer." Onlookers laughed. Respondent's counsel and the woman sitting next to him nervously did not.
The question of exactly what disability she had that required a neodog service animal had already been considered and dismissed as irrelevant.
"Objection! Hostile witness."
"Counsel is reminded that he cannot impeach his own witness. Mrs. Dekolb, while the Court appreciates the occasional outbreak of humor, this is a serious proceeding and a life is at stake. Perhaps not a human life, but still. Counsel will rephrase the question and you will answer it."
"As a trainer of neodogs and natural dogs, which is more dangerous, an untrained neodog or an untrained natural dog?"
"Neodogs require guidance and correction to understand the world they live in. Natural dogs can fall back on animal instinct. Neodogs do not have the cognitive capabilities of an adult human, but neither are they mere animals You might as well ask, which is more dangerous, an abused pet or an abused child? Any animal _or human_ who is untrained is potentially dangerous."
"Thank you, Mrs. Dekolb, that will be all."
"Your Honor, respondent counsel has questions for the witness."
"Granted. Ten minute recess."
Not many people were in court. A few onlookers, one of them clearly a homeless man there for shelter from the rain. A bored city attorney, not accustomed to being made fun of in open court. An angry man with a bandaged right hand, missing two fingers. A well dressed dapper private attorney. His client, shaking with the effort to control herself. As she stood, she stumbled against the table and nearly fell. The angry man glared and muttered under his breath, then left the courtroom.
- - -
This is a hateful place. The stink of fear covers everything. Even the people are afraid. The ground is cold. The water is cold. The food is dry and not much of it.
I am too scared to be bored. I am pacing back and forth endlessly, with nowhere to run to and no way to resist. There are at least six doors between me and the car that took me here.
Where is my person? What did I do wrong?
- - -
By the time she has left the courtroom, the angry man is already on his phone. "This is Sergeant Murdoch. Yes, Doug Murdoch. Yes. No, I can't make it today, I'm in court. I'm on shift tonight until 0600. Tomorrow at 1400? 2 PM? Thank you."
She is ignoring him the best she can, although she is afraid of him. Even in a courthouse full of police, she is afraid. For good reason, because he is one of them. They nod in passing in the hall. He is at home here, in his element.
She is here begging for a life.
His name is Max.
- - -
"Hello, 911, I'd like to report a suspicious person. There's this _woman_ walking back and forth on the sidewalk in front of my house. She has one of those new dogs, you know, neodogs, and the thing growled at me. I don't feel safe in my own home. I want you to send the police right away. What am I paying taxes for? I have a gun, you know, and if that thing comes near me again I'm going to protect myself. They'll be there as soon as they can. _Thank_ you."
- - -
"Mrs. Dekolb, thank you for your time today. I see that you trained the neodog named Max. Is that correct?"
"Yes, sir."
"How would you characterize his training?"
"It takes about three years to train a neodog to the standards of the Guide Dog Society established for semi-sentient companion animals. The first year is entirely socialization -- think of it as puppy training, housebreaking, the same stages you would go through with a toddler. The second year introduces skills and appropriate responses to situations. The third year training is intensive and includes complex decision making skills that would be inappropriate for a natural dog."
"Could you give us an example?"
"Neodogs have color vision similar to the human range. As such they can distinguish red and green traffic signals, walk signals and so on. A natural guide dog can neither tell whether the light is green nor know that it has the right of way as a pedestrian. A human child can learn this by age eight. A neodog can learn traffic law -- and interpret its surroundings -- well enough to walk safely by itself for several blocks in a busy downtown. One of my clients is
a messenger service in Downtown and uses neodogs to deliver packages, especially legal documents."
"Is one of your clients also the police?"
"Yes and no. The city police are not one of my clients. The county sheriff's tactical team is. They primarily use neodogs for searching for criminal suspects and high risk entries. The regional bomb squad also uses camera-equipped neodogs for area searches and for intervention. Another city fire department has three neodogs, also for building searches, but they are trained to rescue infants and children."
"What do you mean by intervention, in the bomb squad context?"
"A neodog can be trained either to recognize and report a suspicious package; or to move it from a place with people around to a place with no people; or to in an emergency attempt to separate the detonator from the main charge with his teeth."
"Can a natural dog be trained for this task?"
"No. A natural dog can be trained on command to use his teeth to control a suspect, and even to do so gently unless the suspect resists, but a natural dog cannot use judgment to decide whether a person is a suspect or not. The human partner of the K-9 team must make this decision, either directly by voice commands or indirectly by using a remote to open the rear door of the K-9 unit."
"Do neodogs receive any training in self defense?"
"Yes and no. Neodogs are trained to submit to proper authority. A person with the right key word can command a neodog to hold still, even in intense pain. A natural dog cannot be trained to do this. However, a neodog _is_ trained to defend his human partner."
"You mentioned traffic law. Is a neodog trained in self defense law as well?"
"No. A neodog is trained to defend humans. A neodog will run away from a threat to itself unless cornered."
The Judge starts to interrupt, then motions for respondent counsel to continue.
"So when Sergeant Murdoch threw my client to the ground, the neodog was acting to defend his human partner?"
"Objection! Sergeant Murdoch is not on trial here."
"Overruled. This is a civil hearing to determine whether a dangerous animal should be destroyed, not a tort case or criminal litigation. I think the question aptly describes what we saw on the video from the patrol car yesterday. Police use of force may be lawful or unlawful - I am inclined towards the former, but that is not what we are deciding today. Repeat the question."
"The neodog perceived a threat to his human and acted in defense of his human."
"But the neodog could not determine that Sergeant Murdoch was a peace officer?"
"No, Max could not. We do not train neodogs for civilian guiding the same way we train neodogs for police work."
"My client testified that she ordered Max to stand down before the Sergeant approached her. The tape had no audio. Sergeant Murdoch testified that she said nothing between the time he saw her, the time he ordered her to take her hands out of her pockets, and when he was bitten. Would a typical natural dog obey the order to stand down?"
"Depends on the dog's training. An untrained natural dog, one kept as a pet, no. A highly trained natural dog, maybe, if the command were reinforced or repeated."
"Would a neodog obey the order to stand down?"
"Again depends on the neo, but also on the type of training.
A rescue neo would, absolutely, because part of their training is to obey a 'stay' command even if their partner is in trouble. A firefighter could be trapped and need to send his neodog to get help. By analogy, if I were your wife, and I told you to do nothing while somebody hit me, would you do nothing?"
"Mrs. Dekolb, do not answer a question with a question."
"Sorry, Your Honor."
"How would a typical guide-trained neodog react to his human partner being attacked?"
"He'd bite the wrist or the lower arm."
"Not the hand?"
"Not ordinarily. The hand is very vulnerable to bite injuries."
Sergeant Murdoch held up his maimed right hand as if to emphasize the point.
"How would a typical _police_-trained neodog react to his human partner being attacked?"
"He'd rip your throat out."
"How can the neodog tell the difference?"
"Partly training. Police neodogs are trained to react very aggressively to an attack on their police partner. If they find a suspect during a building search, they will grab the wrist or lower arm just like a natural K-9. But if that same suspect has a metal object in their hands, such as a gun or knife or pipe, they will literally go for the throat, meeting force with force."
- - -
I have nothing to do but think over and over and over about what I did wrong. I was very bad. I knew it even before the electric shock told me I was very bad.
My person was upset, walking back and forth going nowhere, just down the street from home. The mean person was glaring at us from her house. The alpha humans came in three cars with their blue lights. Two of them went to the mean person but one of them, the pack alpha, came up to my person. She told me to sitzenshe. So I did nothing. He smelled angry and fearful both at once. He gave her an alpha order. She did not roll over. So he threw her down. If she were a dog that would be right. But she is a person and she is my person. My person! So I growled at him. He reached for his belt for a metal thing. Not a shocker but a bang thing.
My alpha dog friends told me that metal things are really bad and bang things are the worst of all.
So I bit his hand so he couldn't get the bang thing out.
Then _she_ told me to sitzenshe and I knew I had done a really bad thing. So I sat there while he shocked me with his other hand. There was yelling and screaming and my human lay on top of me, holding me with both arms with her hands wide open on the sidewalk.
They took her off of me and put metal on her wrists. I just laid there. I could have gotten up between shocks but I didn't.
She said sitzenshe. So I did.
- - -
"Tell me about your training area. Do you keep guide neodogs and police neodogs in the same kennel?"
"Yes."
"Do they talk to each other?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"Do neodogs communicate with each other?"
"Just like natural dogs, by body language and growls and yips and barks."
"Could Max have learned neodog policing skills by communication or by observation?"
"By communication, I doubt it. By observation, yes, certainly."
"Are police neodogs trained to disarm attackers by biting their hands?"
"Yes, but only on command."
"So a neodog would have had to disobey a command to bite someone's hand?"
"No. A neodog acts based on its best judgment. Neodogs are more obedient than natural dogs if highly trained."
"Was Max highly trained?"
"Absolutely."
"So would it be fair to say that Max was neither obeying nor disobeying a command? He was just using his best judgment?"
"That is a key distinction between a natural dog and a neodog. Natural dogs perform skills they are taught, to get food or to please their human partner. A neodog makes choices which skills to use. A bomb squad neodog will bark and circle in a larger and larger spiral if it finds an IED in a crowd, trying to chase people away and draw attention from onlookers. If it finds an IED and there is no crowd, it will run away behind any available cover instead. A natural dog can't make that kind of distinction, to react differently based on different conditions."
- - -
"So the real question here, is not the same as with a natural dog. A natural dog is presumed dangerous when it injures a human, and is treated as property, to be destroyed if it poses a danger to the public. A neodog is more than property. Every neodog is dangerous, but then again, every human is dangerous too. The video shows that Max obeyed commands to be motionless even after being repeatedly Tasered. How many of us could say the same?"
- - -
"An animal is an animal. This neodog improperly bit a person, a police officer, under circumstances where a human would be charged with battery on a police officer, and mayhem, and interfering with the duties of a police officer. A human would be imprisoned. This is not an option with a neodog. The City is asking that the Animal Services Authority recognize this hazard to public safety and with the Court's permission destroy it."
- - -
The Judge came back from his chambers.
"It is said that even a dog has his day in court. We have not heard from the principal witness in this matter."
"Your Honor?"
"Max is not equipped to speak. But the law recognizes that a person - or animal - can be judged by their behavior, rather than their words. I propose a test."
The Judge explained, then added.
"In the absence of compelling evidence, I expect to rule that Max the neodog be destroyed in the interest of public safety."
The respondent counsel and his client conferred briefly.
"We agree to the test, Your Honor."
- - -
The door to the cell opened and a human stood there wearing a shocker and carrying a rope stick.
She motioned for me to leave the cell and I did, then looked expectantly at her to put the rope stick around my neck.
She did not. "Follow me," she barked and I followed her a half step behind and to the right.
We walked past other cages and out to a large paved car lot. The edges were marked off with yellow plastic tree stumps.
My human was on the other side of the lot. I looked around and ran to her.
"Good boy, Max, good boy!" she praised me as I ran up. She petted me and checked my ears and scritched me.
Then I saw the two men walking up. They were in towel suits. I hadn't seen one for a while but I knew only bad people wore them.
One shouted at my human, then the other. My human walked away from them; they followed.
I watched in horror.
What was going on? What were they going to do to her?
Then I remembered my training and I barked. I ran in front of them and I barked. Stay away from my human!
One of them stopped. The other kept going.
So I ran in front of him.
My human tripped and fell on the ground. Normally I would go to her to make sure she was OK, but the other kept coming at her.
So I growled and bared my teeth and barked crisply, again and again. Stay! Away! From! My! Human!
The man in the towel suit reached for his belt and took out a metal thing!
"Sitzenshe!" my human cried desperately.
I quivered. I growled and slavered and drooled. I wanted to bite him _so_ bad. I pawed at the ground.
My human said nothing. I listened so hard. What should I do? What should I do?
The man pointed the metal thing at her and I attacked!
The man and I rolled over and over on the ground. He let go of the metal thing and barked, "SCHNELL!"
Schnell? Schnell?
I let go of his hand and backed off two steps, still growling at him.
Schnell or no schnell, you leave my person alone! I barked.
He backed away. He started saying, "Good dog, good dog" and I ignored his lies. I watched him and I kept glancing at the other one too.
My human said, "Come here, Max, it's OK."
I backed away towards my person, still watching them both.
She was crying.
"It's OK, Max, it's OK."
Even as she hugged me, I kept my eye on them. I didn't trust them.
- - -
"It is the finding of this Court, based on expert testimony from Max's trainer and from sheriff's department neodog trainers, that Max the neodog does not pose a danger to public safety at this time.
"However, it is the law that an animal that has inflicted serious injuries on a human may be destroyed at the request of competent authority, and I have before me a request from a competent authority. Does the City wish to withdraw this request at this time?"
The City attorney shook his head.
"No, Your Honor."
"I do not believe the interests of justice are served by this request, Counsel. Do you care to reconsider?"
"I have instructions from the City Police Chief in this matter, Your Honor. No."
"This Court has no choice but to order the destruction of the neodog Max at this time. However, the execution of this order shall be stayed indefinitely."
Everyone in the courtroom looked puzzled.
"This Court has just received formal notice of litigation pending in the 9th Circuit that alleges that neodogs are sapient and therefore have human rights under the Constitution of the United States, particularly the right to a trial by jury and protection against cruel and unusual punishment. This Federal lawsuit has been amended with the highly unusual claim that Max is a litigant in his own right.
"In the meantime I release the neodog Max to the care and custody of his human protector. Nothing in my order prevents either you or Max from leaving the County; this civil destruction order only applies within my limited jurisdiction.
"This dog _will_ have his day in court. So ruled."
- - -
US FEDERAL DISTRICT COURT, 9TH CIRCUIT
You are summoned to jury service in the matter of Neodogs, Guide Dog Society, California Neodog Rescue Group, Max et al.
You are therefore commanded to appear . . .
- - -
"What is the verdict of the jury?"
Judgment Call
Copyright 2014 by Drew Kitty, All Rights Reserved
prepublication copy, not for public distribution
(pride) I am proud of what I do. I see others running around. Most are in cars or yards. More often I smell them. On wood trees and metal trees. But I am too busy to sniff the news. I work for a living. I keep her safe. I look out for cars. I stop at curbs and stairs. I look for low things she might fall into and high things she might run into. I work. I work hard. Sometimes I am bored listening to people saying people things. But I am very proud.
I used to be proud.
- - -
"In your opinion, are neodogs as _stable_ as regular trained dogs?"
"Objection, leading the witness!"
"Rephrase the question, counselor."
"In your opinion, how stable are neodogs?"
"They are more sure-footed than natural dogs."
"Will the witness please answer the question?"
"Will the attorney please ask the question he wants answered?"
The Judge interrupts. "Mrs. Dekolb, please. Do not answer a question with a question. Counsel will rephrase the question again."
"Mrs. Dekolb, as a trainer of both neodogs and 'natural' dogs, which is more psychologically stable?"
"Neodogs are the product of genetic engineering. They are smarter than _natural_ dogs and require more attention, more training. A well trained neodog is much more stable than a natural dog."
"What if the neodog is less well trained?"
"He might become a lawyer." Onlookers laughed. Respondent's counsel and the woman sitting next to him nervously did not.
The question of exactly what disability she had that required a neodog service animal had already been considered and dismissed as irrelevant.
"Objection! Hostile witness."
"Counsel is reminded that he cannot impeach his own witness. Mrs. Dekolb, while the Court appreciates the occasional outbreak of humor, this is a serious proceeding and a life is at stake. Perhaps not a human life, but still. Counsel will rephrase the question and you will answer it."
"As a trainer of neodogs and natural dogs, which is more dangerous, an untrained neodog or an untrained natural dog?"
"Neodogs require guidance and correction to understand the world they live in. Natural dogs can fall back on animal instinct. Neodogs do not have the cognitive capabilities of an adult human, but neither are they mere animals You might as well ask, which is more dangerous, an abused pet or an abused child? Any animal _or human_ who is untrained is potentially dangerous."
"Thank you, Mrs. Dekolb, that will be all."
"Your Honor, respondent counsel has questions for the witness."
"Granted. Ten minute recess."
Not many people were in court. A few onlookers, one of them clearly a homeless man there for shelter from the rain. A bored city attorney, not accustomed to being made fun of in open court. An angry man with a bandaged right hand, missing two fingers. A well dressed dapper private attorney. His client, shaking with the effort to control herself. As she stood, she stumbled against the table and nearly fell. The angry man glared and muttered under his breath, then left the courtroom.
- - -
This is a hateful place. The stink of fear covers everything. Even the people are afraid. The ground is cold. The water is cold. The food is dry and not much of it.
I am too scared to be bored. I am pacing back and forth endlessly, with nowhere to run to and no way to resist. There are at least six doors between me and the car that took me here.
Where is my person? What did I do wrong?
- - -
By the time she has left the courtroom, the angry man is already on his phone. "This is Sergeant Murdoch. Yes, Doug Murdoch. Yes. No, I can't make it today, I'm in court. I'm on shift tonight until 0600. Tomorrow at 1400? 2 PM? Thank you."
She is ignoring him the best she can, although she is afraid of him. Even in a courthouse full of police, she is afraid. For good reason, because he is one of them. They nod in passing in the hall. He is at home here, in his element.
She is here begging for a life.
His name is Max.
- - -
"Hello, 911, I'd like to report a suspicious person. There's this _woman_ walking back and forth on the sidewalk in front of my house. She has one of those new dogs, you know, neodogs, and the thing growled at me. I don't feel safe in my own home. I want you to send the police right away. What am I paying taxes for? I have a gun, you know, and if that thing comes near me again I'm going to protect myself. They'll be there as soon as they can. _Thank_ you."
- - -
"Mrs. Dekolb, thank you for your time today. I see that you trained the neodog named Max. Is that correct?"
"Yes, sir."
"How would you characterize his training?"
"It takes about three years to train a neodog to the standards of the Guide Dog Society established for semi-sentient companion animals. The first year is entirely socialization -- think of it as puppy training, housebreaking, the same stages you would go through with a toddler. The second year introduces skills and appropriate responses to situations. The third year training is intensive and includes complex decision making skills that would be inappropriate for a natural dog."
"Could you give us an example?"
"Neodogs have color vision similar to the human range. As such they can distinguish red and green traffic signals, walk signals and so on. A natural guide dog can neither tell whether the light is green nor know that it has the right of way as a pedestrian. A human child can learn this by age eight. A neodog can learn traffic law -- and interpret its surroundings -- well enough to walk safely by itself for several blocks in a busy downtown. One of my clients is
a messenger service in Downtown and uses neodogs to deliver packages, especially legal documents."
"Is one of your clients also the police?"
"Yes and no. The city police are not one of my clients. The county sheriff's tactical team is. They primarily use neodogs for searching for criminal suspects and high risk entries. The regional bomb squad also uses camera-equipped neodogs for area searches and for intervention. Another city fire department has three neodogs, also for building searches, but they are trained to rescue infants and children."
"What do you mean by intervention, in the bomb squad context?"
"A neodog can be trained either to recognize and report a suspicious package; or to move it from a place with people around to a place with no people; or to in an emergency attempt to separate the detonator from the main charge with his teeth."
"Can a natural dog be trained for this task?"
"No. A natural dog can be trained on command to use his teeth to control a suspect, and even to do so gently unless the suspect resists, but a natural dog cannot use judgment to decide whether a person is a suspect or not. The human partner of the K-9 team must make this decision, either directly by voice commands or indirectly by using a remote to open the rear door of the K-9 unit."
"Do neodogs receive any training in self defense?"
"Yes and no. Neodogs are trained to submit to proper authority. A person with the right key word can command a neodog to hold still, even in intense pain. A natural dog cannot be trained to do this. However, a neodog _is_ trained to defend his human partner."
"You mentioned traffic law. Is a neodog trained in self defense law as well?"
"No. A neodog is trained to defend humans. A neodog will run away from a threat to itself unless cornered."
The Judge starts to interrupt, then motions for respondent counsel to continue.
"So when Sergeant Murdoch threw my client to the ground, the neodog was acting to defend his human partner?"
"Objection! Sergeant Murdoch is not on trial here."
"Overruled. This is a civil hearing to determine whether a dangerous animal should be destroyed, not a tort case or criminal litigation. I think the question aptly describes what we saw on the video from the patrol car yesterday. Police use of force may be lawful or unlawful - I am inclined towards the former, but that is not what we are deciding today. Repeat the question."
"The neodog perceived a threat to his human and acted in defense of his human."
"But the neodog could not determine that Sergeant Murdoch was a peace officer?"
"No, Max could not. We do not train neodogs for civilian guiding the same way we train neodogs for police work."
"My client testified that she ordered Max to stand down before the Sergeant approached her. The tape had no audio. Sergeant Murdoch testified that she said nothing between the time he saw her, the time he ordered her to take her hands out of her pockets, and when he was bitten. Would a typical natural dog obey the order to stand down?"
"Depends on the dog's training. An untrained natural dog, one kept as a pet, no. A highly trained natural dog, maybe, if the command were reinforced or repeated."
"Would a neodog obey the order to stand down?"
"Again depends on the neo, but also on the type of training.
A rescue neo would, absolutely, because part of their training is to obey a 'stay' command even if their partner is in trouble. A firefighter could be trapped and need to send his neodog to get help. By analogy, if I were your wife, and I told you to do nothing while somebody hit me, would you do nothing?"
"Mrs. Dekolb, do not answer a question with a question."
"Sorry, Your Honor."
"How would a typical guide-trained neodog react to his human partner being attacked?"
"He'd bite the wrist or the lower arm."
"Not the hand?"
"Not ordinarily. The hand is very vulnerable to bite injuries."
Sergeant Murdoch held up his maimed right hand as if to emphasize the point.
"How would a typical _police_-trained neodog react to his human partner being attacked?"
"He'd rip your throat out."
"How can the neodog tell the difference?"
"Partly training. Police neodogs are trained to react very aggressively to an attack on their police partner. If they find a suspect during a building search, they will grab the wrist or lower arm just like a natural K-9. But if that same suspect has a metal object in their hands, such as a gun or knife or pipe, they will literally go for the throat, meeting force with force."
- - -
I have nothing to do but think over and over and over about what I did wrong. I was very bad. I knew it even before the electric shock told me I was very bad.
My person was upset, walking back and forth going nowhere, just down the street from home. The mean person was glaring at us from her house. The alpha humans came in three cars with their blue lights. Two of them went to the mean person but one of them, the pack alpha, came up to my person. She told me to sitzenshe. So I did nothing. He smelled angry and fearful both at once. He gave her an alpha order. She did not roll over. So he threw her down. If she were a dog that would be right. But she is a person and she is my person. My person! So I growled at him. He reached for his belt for a metal thing. Not a shocker but a bang thing.
My alpha dog friends told me that metal things are really bad and bang things are the worst of all.
So I bit his hand so he couldn't get the bang thing out.
Then _she_ told me to sitzenshe and I knew I had done a really bad thing. So I sat there while he shocked me with his other hand. There was yelling and screaming and my human lay on top of me, holding me with both arms with her hands wide open on the sidewalk.
They took her off of me and put metal on her wrists. I just laid there. I could have gotten up between shocks but I didn't.
She said sitzenshe. So I did.
- - -
"Tell me about your training area. Do you keep guide neodogs and police neodogs in the same kennel?"
"Yes."
"Do they talk to each other?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"Do neodogs communicate with each other?"
"Just like natural dogs, by body language and growls and yips and barks."
"Could Max have learned neodog policing skills by communication or by observation?"
"By communication, I doubt it. By observation, yes, certainly."
"Are police neodogs trained to disarm attackers by biting their hands?"
"Yes, but only on command."
"So a neodog would have had to disobey a command to bite someone's hand?"
"No. A neodog acts based on its best judgment. Neodogs are more obedient than natural dogs if highly trained."
"Was Max highly trained?"
"Absolutely."
"So would it be fair to say that Max was neither obeying nor disobeying a command? He was just using his best judgment?"
"That is a key distinction between a natural dog and a neodog. Natural dogs perform skills they are taught, to get food or to please their human partner. A neodog makes choices which skills to use. A bomb squad neodog will bark and circle in a larger and larger spiral if it finds an IED in a crowd, trying to chase people away and draw attention from onlookers. If it finds an IED and there is no crowd, it will run away behind any available cover instead. A natural dog can't make that kind of distinction, to react differently based on different conditions."
- - -
"So the real question here, is not the same as with a natural dog. A natural dog is presumed dangerous when it injures a human, and is treated as property, to be destroyed if it poses a danger to the public. A neodog is more than property. Every neodog is dangerous, but then again, every human is dangerous too. The video shows that Max obeyed commands to be motionless even after being repeatedly Tasered. How many of us could say the same?"
- - -
"An animal is an animal. This neodog improperly bit a person, a police officer, under circumstances where a human would be charged with battery on a police officer, and mayhem, and interfering with the duties of a police officer. A human would be imprisoned. This is not an option with a neodog. The City is asking that the Animal Services Authority recognize this hazard to public safety and with the Court's permission destroy it."
- - -
The Judge came back from his chambers.
"It is said that even a dog has his day in court. We have not heard from the principal witness in this matter."
"Your Honor?"
"Max is not equipped to speak. But the law recognizes that a person - or animal - can be judged by their behavior, rather than their words. I propose a test."
The Judge explained, then added.
"In the absence of compelling evidence, I expect to rule that Max the neodog be destroyed in the interest of public safety."
The respondent counsel and his client conferred briefly.
"We agree to the test, Your Honor."
- - -
The door to the cell opened and a human stood there wearing a shocker and carrying a rope stick.
She motioned for me to leave the cell and I did, then looked expectantly at her to put the rope stick around my neck.
She did not. "Follow me," she barked and I followed her a half step behind and to the right.
We walked past other cages and out to a large paved car lot. The edges were marked off with yellow plastic tree stumps.
My human was on the other side of the lot. I looked around and ran to her.
"Good boy, Max, good boy!" she praised me as I ran up. She petted me and checked my ears and scritched me.
Then I saw the two men walking up. They were in towel suits. I hadn't seen one for a while but I knew only bad people wore them.
One shouted at my human, then the other. My human walked away from them; they followed.
I watched in horror.
What was going on? What were they going to do to her?
Then I remembered my training and I barked. I ran in front of them and I barked. Stay away from my human!
One of them stopped. The other kept going.
So I ran in front of him.
My human tripped and fell on the ground. Normally I would go to her to make sure she was OK, but the other kept coming at her.
So I growled and bared my teeth and barked crisply, again and again. Stay! Away! From! My! Human!
The man in the towel suit reached for his belt and took out a metal thing!
"Sitzenshe!" my human cried desperately.
I quivered. I growled and slavered and drooled. I wanted to bite him _so_ bad. I pawed at the ground.
My human said nothing. I listened so hard. What should I do? What should I do?
The man pointed the metal thing at her and I attacked!
The man and I rolled over and over on the ground. He let go of the metal thing and barked, "SCHNELL!"
Schnell? Schnell?
I let go of his hand and backed off two steps, still growling at him.
Schnell or no schnell, you leave my person alone! I barked.
He backed away. He started saying, "Good dog, good dog" and I ignored his lies. I watched him and I kept glancing at the other one too.
My human said, "Come here, Max, it's OK."
I backed away towards my person, still watching them both.
She was crying.
"It's OK, Max, it's OK."
Even as she hugged me, I kept my eye on them. I didn't trust them.
- - -
"It is the finding of this Court, based on expert testimony from Max's trainer and from sheriff's department neodog trainers, that Max the neodog does not pose a danger to public safety at this time.
"However, it is the law that an animal that has inflicted serious injuries on a human may be destroyed at the request of competent authority, and I have before me a request from a competent authority. Does the City wish to withdraw this request at this time?"
The City attorney shook his head.
"No, Your Honor."
"I do not believe the interests of justice are served by this request, Counsel. Do you care to reconsider?"
"I have instructions from the City Police Chief in this matter, Your Honor. No."
"This Court has no choice but to order the destruction of the neodog Max at this time. However, the execution of this order shall be stayed indefinitely."
Everyone in the courtroom looked puzzled.
"This Court has just received formal notice of litigation pending in the 9th Circuit that alleges that neodogs are sapient and therefore have human rights under the Constitution of the United States, particularly the right to a trial by jury and protection against cruel and unusual punishment. This Federal lawsuit has been amended with the highly unusual claim that Max is a litigant in his own right.
"In the meantime I release the neodog Max to the care and custody of his human protector. Nothing in my order prevents either you or Max from leaving the County; this civil destruction order only applies within my limited jurisdiction.
"This dog _will_ have his day in court. So ruled."
- - -
US FEDERAL DISTRICT COURT, 9TH CIRCUIT
You are summoned to jury service in the matter of Neodogs, Guide Dog Society, California Neodog Rescue Group, Max et al.
You are therefore commanded to appear . . .
- - -
"What is the verdict of the jury?"
